Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
