Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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