I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
id be glad to
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
