I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
