they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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