Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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