Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
