she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
