help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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