ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
