I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
you had me at cake vodka
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
