Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
