just tell him i said nine months
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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