Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
