help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
