I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I love having hate sex.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
