I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
