I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
