Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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