I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
