We're like a lot better than the average bears
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
