Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
