so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Randomize
