His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
