I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
