You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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