drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Randomize
