these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
