i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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