yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
