Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
