Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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