in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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