its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
