This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
