So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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