I'm so fucking centered right now
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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