I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
and i looked up. we had an audience...
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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