I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I love black thongs
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
