foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
