clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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