I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
