I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Randomize
