is your mom at the bar?
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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This baby is an asshole
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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