before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
i think im in europe. pls send help
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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