Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
