I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
