its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
