Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
