:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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